Very Funny Punjabi Jokes Collections 2018

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Very Funny Punjabi Jokes Collections 2018

chuha har roz sherni kol kapre da tukda(piece of cloth) sut janda a….. 10-15 eda hi chlda rhnda a. te 1 din sherni us nu fad k khndi a, marjanya ki tu roz kapra sutt k bhj janda a tenu bimari ki a. aggo chuha us nu khnda a,” paave phulkari utte vel butian mittran de chaadre te paade morni”

Ik Jameendar Apne Ristedar Te Fukri Marda Hoya Kehenda Hai: Jad Main Savere Savere Car Ch Apni Jameena Dekhan Layi Janda Han Tan Sanjh Tak Vi Poori Jameen Nhi Dekh Paunda.
Rishtedar: Tusi Theek Kehende Ho 3 Saal Pehlan Saade Kol Vi Eho Jehi Ik Khatara Car Hundi Si, Assi Kabadi Nu Bech Ditti Si.

Ek War Gandhi Te Nehru Di Ladai Ho Jandi Hai,
Gandhi To Nehru: Sare Jahan Se Accha Nehru De Pet Wich Baccha.
Nehru To Gandhi: Vandey Matram Gandhi Sala Takla Besharam…

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Santa Ik Wari Nadi Ch Digg Peya
Te Oh Paani Ch Dubban Lagda Ae,
Fer Oh HadBadanda Te Dubda-Dubda Hoya
Ik Machi Nu Fad K Bahr Sutt Dinda Ae
Te Kehnda Ke Saliye Main Te Marna Ee Ae
Chal Tu Te Apni Jaan Bcha Lai…

Wife Ne Ik Nava Mobile Sim Kharidya,
Husband Nu Surprise Den Layi, Ohne Kitchen Ch Jaake Call Karya, “Hiii Darling”.
Husband: Call you later, Darling, The devil is near in Kitchen…

Ik var di gal hai Ik jatt te ik angrej
train vich safar kar rahe hunde ne
angrej ohnu kehnda main tenu ik poem snauna
jatt kehnda thik aa
angrej: Twinkle-Twinkle little star how I wonder what you are?
fer angrej kehnda hun tu suna
jatt nu kush samaj ta lagdi ni par oh snaun lagda te kehnda
Tinde-Tinde Amb da Achaar Khao Roti Maro Dakaar

Husband to Wife: Je Meri Naukari Nikal Jave Tan Tu Ki Karengi?
Badi Soch Vichar Ton Baad – Wife: Main Adhe Paise Laike Tenu Chhadd Devnagi…
Husband: Meri 100 Rupye Di Lottery Nikali Hai, Aa Fad 50 Rupye Te Dafa Hoja…
wife : suno ji ! is hafte film dekhange te agle hafte puri shopping karange,
Husband : ohton agle hafte assi mandir javange,
Wife : oh kyun…?
Husband : bheekh mangange….

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Mehmaan, “Main Jad Vi Tuhade Ghar Te Aake Khana Khanda Han, Tan Tuhada Kutta Mainu Lagatar Ghoorda Rehenda Hai, Ehnu Koi Bimari Tan Ni Hai?”
Mejban Da Baccha: Uncle Jee, Oh Apni Plate Nu Changi Taranh Pachhaanda Hai

Ik Munde Ne Ek Kudi Nu Kamal Da Phull Vekhaya,
Kudi Ne Ohnu Ik Jordar Chaped Maari,
Munda Bolya, Main Tan BJP Da Parchar Kar Reha Si,
Tu Menu Kyu Maarya?
Kudi Boli, Main Congress Da Parchar Kar Rahi Han..

Ik Tivi Babe De Kol Ja Ke Kehendi,
“Baba Jee, Mere Aadmi Menu Ghar Aunde Saar Maarna Peetna Suru Kar Dinda Hai”,
Baba Kehenda, “Aah Lai Taabeez, Jad Vi Tera Gharwala, Ghar Aave, Ehnu Apne Moonh Ch Paa Lavi Te,
Te Thodi Der Munh Na Kholi”,
7 Din Baad Tivi Khush Hundi Hoyi, Fer Babe Kol Gyi,
Kehendi, “Baba Jee Kamaal Ho Gya, Jad Tak Main Tabeez Nu Munh Ch Rakhdi Han, Oh Menu Kuch Ni Kehenda”
Baba Kehenda, “Beta, Aa Tabeez Da Ni Teri Jubaan Band Rakhan Da Fayda Hai…”

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Rabb ne tiwi nu sunder banaya
Khoobsurat dimaag vi diya
Hirni jehi aakhan deyi
Gulab jehe honth
Pyar bharya dil ditta
Te fer Jubaan deke sab te pani fer ditta…

Teacher: Baccho, Dasso Jehde Loki Galat Kamm Karde Ne,
Oh Kithe Jande Ne??
Ik Kudi Boli Sharmande Hoye: Madam Sehar De Loki Hotel Te,
Te Pendu Loki Motor Te…

Kudi Apne Boyfriend Nu Boli, Main Apna Purse Ghar Bhull Aayi Haan,
Te Yaar Mainu 1000 Rupye Di Jarurat Pai Gayi…
Munda: Karti Ni Chhoti Gall, Main Haiga.
Eh Fad 10 Rupye, Te Karke Ricksaw, Nash Ke Gharon Di Apna Purse Chak Lya…

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Santa: oye tenu pta hai sarkaar ne chaar aane band kar dite hai?
Banta: o kyun santa oye sarkaar kolo ek anna (hazzare) nhi sambhalya jaa
rhea te o chaar aane kivein sambhalegi…

Kudi Bust Stop Te Khadi, Mobile Te Gallan Kar Rahi Si,
Boy ohnu Comment karda hai: Haye! Kash main mobile hunda, teriyan Gaallan (chicks) naal lagya hunda…
Kudi: Haan, fer main ghar jaa ke charger teri *$%*& ch laundi…

Custmer: teri majh di 1 akh ta khrab hai, fer v tu isde 25 hzar rupye mang
reha hai.
Santa: tenu majh dudh peen layi chahidi hai ya nain-matakka karn
layi…

Kudi Apne Boyfriend Nu Boli, Main Apna Purse Ghar Bhull Aayi Haan,
Te Yaar Mainu 1000 Rupye Di Jarurat Pai Gayi…
Munda: Karti Ni Chhoti Gall, Main Haiga.
Eh Fad 10 Rupye, Te Karke Ricksaw, Nash Ke Gharon Di Apna Purse Chak Lya…

Wife to Husband: Tumhe Pyar Karna Nahi Aata.
Husband: To Kya Ye Bachhe Internet Se Download Kiye Hain???
Wife: Nahi Eh Tan Singh Sahab De Pen Drive To Litte Ne.

Ikk Machhar Udeya Ja Reha Si,
Raste Vich Tufaan Aa Gaya,
Machhar Ik Vadde, Mote Darkhat Nu Chimmad Gya
Toofan Ruk Gya, Fer Machhar Parsina Poonjh Ke Bolya
Je Ajj Main Na Hunda Eh Darkhat Bhi Gir Jana Si…

Wife Ne Kurti Kaddi,
Fer Madhosh Nazran Naal Sante Vall Dekhde Hoye
Apni Salwar Laahndi Hoyi Kehan Laggi,
“Pata Hai Na, Ajj Ki Karna Hai?”
Santa: Saali, Main Ajj Raat Nu Kapde Nahi Dhowanga…

Santa: Main Kal Tainu Kinne Vaar Phone Milaya,
Par Tu Kyu Nai Chakkeya?
Banta: Kyun Chakku Phone? Kal Main Jehda RS. 30/- Deke Gana
Lavaya Hai Oh Ki Tera Peyo Sunega…